HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
