Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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