You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
