Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
You dont lie about slip and slides
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
You were trust falling into bushes
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Randomize
