I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
