Why are handjobs necessary in class?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
