Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Randomize
