He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
