Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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