Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
i think i just lost a toe
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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