Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize