I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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