oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Randomize
