i jhust puked up my retainher.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
We need to get me chipped asap
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
