i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
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