elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Randomize
