i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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