STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
