Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
