i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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