its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
