So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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