my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
