i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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