i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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