Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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