glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize