It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
