good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
