I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
