i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I AM VODKA MAN
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Randomize
