You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
