yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
