Got a toothbrush?
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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