But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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