She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
