it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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