finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
