i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
