My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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