There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
