Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
