Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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