my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
organizing the empties. That sober.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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