she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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