I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
