a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
