Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
She announced her abortion via fbk
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
