if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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