After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
True strength comes from lack of pants
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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