He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
