He asked to "fluff my boner.."
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Randomize
